What I’ve Learned From Going on 15 First Dates

Since I’ve graduated college, I’ve learned a thing or two about going on first dates. I’ve officially been on 15 first dates now. Some of those dates led to second dates, thirds dates and most commonly no dates but for argument’s sake, let’s just talk about the first dates.  I’m not a pro by any means and I’ve got a long, long ways to go, but here are a few things I’ve learned along the way:

  1. Don’t let your nerves get to you (too much). Okay, this goes without saying that it’s IMPOSSIBLE not to get nervous. If you’re not nervous at all, something is wrong with you and you’re a super human. Just breathe deeply and try to relax. You will survive! If you’re really, really nervous go for a walk to use up some of that energy. Breathe.
  2. As much as you want them to like you, you need to like them too. This one is hard for me to remember. Not only do I want to seem cool, funny, outgoing, put-together … I need to be looking and seeing if they are a good fit for me in return.
  3. Awkward silences are inevitable. Period. There’s no way around it so just grin and bear it. Don’t panic if it’s quiet for a few seconds (or many seconds). If you’re trying to fill the silence but the conversation keeps dying, take a slow sip of your drink or have another bite of your food. It’ll save you 3-7 seconds which is something.
  4. Pin your bangs back or to the side. You have to! No one wants to talk to someone who’s constantly picking at their hair. I’m a fidget-er when I’m nervous so I pin my bangs to the side so I don’t play with my hair.
  5. When you arrive, text him and tell him what you’re wearing. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve struggled to find the guy I’m going on a date with. It’s extremely stressful and causes me to panic when I do a lap of the bar or coffee shop and can’t find him. I’ve even had bartenders ask me, “Do you need help?” YES! GET ME OUT OF HERE. Some guys look WAY different in real life compared to their photos, depending if they’re wearing a hat, glasses or have facial hair and so on. You’d be surprised. If you tell him what you’re wearing, let’s pray that he’ll flag you down or find you ASAP.

Try to remind yourself that it’s good to step out of your comfort zone. It can be really hard and really scary, but it’s also really rewarding to see yourself do something you didn’t think you could do. So from one single lady to another, good luck!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s